Like every day's my last, this time runs extra fast..

  HAPPY NEW YEAR !!! ☮ ✌

I don't know about you but my 2011 verged on the ridiculously unforgiving. Its a wonder I made it through without committing murder, or arson.. It was like being stripped off my last bit of sanity. Luckily that's over, and 2012 finally offers us a hopeful glimpse at a clearer horizon. Since it's the year the Mayans have apparently predicted our doom, surely it isn't a bad idea to take this year by the horns and go at a race pace, fun loving, much dancing, loud laughing and life living.. to the maximum.. right? 

As for me, I ended my turbulent year with lots of windy days, sickeningly perfect sunsets, a few sunrise moments,  a kiss under the fireworks, one too many drinks and a French boy I adore. A couple of days into the new year and I am perfectly content counting my (few)pesos, making ridiculous travel plans, working my behind off and spending mucho time with friends who matter. When a breather from teaching is finally in order, I'm going to write my 2012 bucket list in the thickest marker I can find on a bit of neon cardboard and hang it on my wall for me to always see right before I jet out of the house and into the sun.. After all, there is still lots of wall space in my room meant for this purpose, right underneath my perfectly placed fairy lights..

How was your NYE? ☺

We were born and raised in a summer haze, bound by the surprise of our glory days

I wish I knew how to make sense of life sometimes. Like a speeding bullet doing spirals around me, it is so hard to follow and even harder to control. I find myself stopping, shutting my eyes, trembling in fear, not knowing at which point I will be hit, but I cannot run from it, I cannot hide, it is there, it is crippling and it turns me into  a cowering mess of emotions. Life.

The only thing in life that is constant is change. You either sink or swim, but either way, you cannot stop the change. I crawl to the edge of reason, and peek over it, clutching to my sanity, praying I don't stumble and fall.. and lose myself completely. My heart is heavy, saying goodbye to places, people, habits, routines.. you learn to love what you have and then when it is gone, you wonder. Why?

It is a question you will ask yourself over and over again in life. You can choose to be ahead of the game and choose bravery and embrace all things that come your way. You can say, "I did my best.", wipe away your tears and start anew. Or you can let your blind refusal get the best of you.. we all have our ways of coping. Your heart will be heavy over and over again, but as long as you realize, that life is a constant cycle of change, you will see clearly, you will be prepared for every bit of change that comes your way, and you will find your way through that storm. You have to believe that you will find a rainbow at the end of it, because cliché or not, in my world of hurricanes, each and every time I have been swept away by the torrential rains and floods of my existence, I have always found my way out of the darkness, and back into the clarity of the light.